Posts Tagged ‘mindfulness’
By Alex Mirsakova , AMFT
We live in a fast-paced, high- stress society, one that highlights constant productivity and achievement. The concept of slowing down and taking a break seems out of the question for many of us. Yet, the importance of taking care of our own mental well-being, and the importance of slowing down when it feels as though we must go faster – cannot be ignored. It seems counterproductive to be told to “slow down” when we feel as though we must constantly rush. But perhaps the next time we feel that familiar overwhelming sense of urgency, we can accept it as an opportunity to pause.
Developed by Kristin Neff and Chris Germer, the practice of the self-compassion break is designed for you to directly experience the three elements of self-compassion:
1) Mindfulness
2) Common Humanity
3) Kindness.
It can be used as often as you need, through a moment of pain, difficulty, frustration, or intense pressure.
I invite you to take the self-compassion break:
Take a few deep breaths and settle into your body. Take four seconds to breathe in. Take four seconds to breathe out. Focus on your breath. Focus on the sensations in your body.
Now, bring to mind a situation in your life that is creating stress or paining you. When first learning this practice, choose a problem that’s in the mild to moderate range so that you may gradually develop this quality of self-compassion.
What changes are you observing in your body? What discomforts are you noticing? What sensations are coming up for you?
When challenges are present, it is important to take time to stay calm and mindful. Speak to yourself gently and acknowledge that you are experiencing discomfort in this moment.
Mindfulness Statements:
I am not okay
I am under a lot of stress
This is frustrating
Common Humanity
As you embrace the challenges in your life, you can begin reflecting on the challenging experiences in life that all humans live through. Inviting yourself to connect with humanity and accepting that pain is a part of life will help you understand that you are not alone in your time of despair.
“I feel, through my struggle, what others feel. In this way, I am sensing this feeling as not just my own, but as a deep connection to many other people.”
Experiment with offering yourself a simple gesture of soothing touch. One option is placing your hand over your heart. Experiment with finding what feels soothing and right for you. Feel the warmth and gentle touch of your hands. You may tap lightly on your body as you ground yourself.
Words of Affirmation and Positive Statements of Kindness
Perhaps there are particular words of kindness and support that you need to hear in this difficult situation. What simple message might be a caring response? If you are having difficulty summoning the words, consider what you would offer a dear friend or a loved one who is experiencing a painful moment. What would you say to this loved one? Now, see if you can offer the same message to yourself.
I can be kind to myself
I accept where I am in my life
I forgive myself for past mistakes
I am growing to trust myself more everyday
Alex is a pre-licensed clinician who works with couples, individuals, and children/ teens ( ages 10 and up). She is bilingual and speaks Russian and English. She works via telehealth as well as in person at our Glendale, Pasadena , and Sherman Oaks offices with flexible evenings and weekends scheduling. Book with her today .
Fatigue and Chronic Pain
Have you been feeling tired lately? Does the word “tired” not even begin to cover the level of your seemingly constant exhaustion? You might be experiencing fatigue!
If you are not familiar with the term, fatigue is not just feeling tired. It is a severe, sometimes incapacitating feeling of exhaustion that is made worse by physical and mental exertion. Unfortunately, those who experience chronic pain can sometimes find themselves encountering debilitating fatigue in addition to the physical strain they already face. If this fatigue persists for more than six months, you might even be experiencing chronic fatigue syndrome. Be aware that there are many symptoms of chronic pain and chronic fatigue that overlap, and so, differentiating between the symptoms of each illness may become difficult. Those experiencing both illnesses may notice non-restorative sleep, brain fog, widespread chronic pain, neurological abnormalities, and sensitivity to light, sounds and odors. Of course, presentation and severity of symptoms can vary for each individual, but in all cases, both illnesses require heightened awareness of individual needs.
As mentioned, fatigue can become exacerbated if you overly exert yourself, as is also true with chronic pain symptoms. As such, it is imperative that those experiencing chronic pain and chronic fatigue remain in tune with their body’s and mind’s needs at all times. In your case, self-care is not a luxury; it is a way of maintaining quality of life. There are several ways to be mindful of your needs when experiencing both chronic pain and chronic fatigue.
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Do a body check.
When was the last time you stopped what you were doing and conducted a mental scan of how your body is holding up? If your last body check was recent, do you conduct the scan regularly, or wait until you are already feeling pain and exhaustion? Pay attention to your body when it’s trying to speak to you! Proactively checking on your sensitive areas and being aware of your warning signals is extremely useful if you want to lessen the amount of times you feel the worst symptoms of your illness.
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Plan and prioritize.
Planning breaks during activities is essential in order to avoid aggravating your symptoms. Over-exertion may not seem like too big of a problem when you are in the middle of having fun or getting chores done, but you will feel the negative effects soon enough when your pain flares up or severe exhaustion drags you to sleep. Take scheduled breaks, even if you don’t feel like you need one yet! If you are out and about, the break can include simply sitting down or leaning on something for five or ten minutes so your body can relax. If you are hard at work and forcing deep focus on your assignment, switch to a mindless or easier task for ten to fifteen minutes so you can give your mind a chance to rest and recalibrate. Regularly plan breaks based on your limits and needs. Prioritize your mental and physical health over your tasks and activities.
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Mind your sleep hygiene.
Conducting regular body scans and planning much needed breaks are good to do during the day, but figuring out a healthy sleep schedule is very important during the night hours. Bad sleep hygiene can have many negative effects on both chronic pain and fatigue, especially since both include non-restorative sleep as a symptom. As you may have discovered, getting sleep does not always mean getting rest. Therefore, it is important to have a nightly routine that prepares your body and mind for rest. For example, try going to sleep and waking up around the same time every day to maintain a consistent sleep cycle. Avoid exposing yourself to the blue light emitted from your TV, phone, or tablet before sleeping, as this stimulates the brain and reduces the release of the sleep chemical melatonin due to the blue light being perceived as daylight. Lastly, make sure your sleep environment is comfortable and lacking any disruptive sounds or lights. Remember, you might not be able to control your pain and fatigue, but you can certainly control what you do to mitigate the intensity of your symptoms! Be kind to yourself. You are worth the effort.
References:
- What is ME/CFS: About the disease. Retrieved from https://solvecfs.org/about-the-disease/
- What is sleep hygiene. Retrieved from https://sleep.org/articles/sleep-hygiene/
